I would suggest something like :
How do you spend most of your free time?
a) with friends, at the coffee-shop, cinema, restaurant, etc.
b) with friends, in the masjid
c) with family, at home or outside
d) alone, watching TV, going on the net, plating video games, etc.
e) alone, reading Qur’an, praying, seeking ‘ilm

Questions:

1. Have you ever been incarcerated?

A. Yes
B. No

2. If yes to #1 for how long?

A. For a very short time (less than 72 hours)
B. For more than 3 months
C. For more than a year
D. For more than 3 years

3. Will you agree to show me valid results from a HIV/Aids test?

A. Yes
B. No (if no why)?

No to 3

Short explanation

My brother do you have a beard?

1. Yes, Alhamdulillaah Its wajib.

2. No, It does not suit me.

3. No, It is not compulsory rather optional.

4. No, My relatives, friends or job does not allow.

5. No, But I am going to grow it Insha Allaah.

Do you want to have children?
a) Yes as soon as possible and as many as Allah gives me
b) I already have children but want more
c) in a few years in shaa Allah
d) No my life style keeps me too busy to have kids
e) No I don’t get along well with children

Question: How you been married before and for how long?

Question: Do you want to have babies?

Question: Do you like being slim or chubby?

Question: What do you look for in a partner?

Question: Have you ever been in a long time relationship?

its not alwayes the matter of asking questions .. i will try to notice if he is a faithfull person by seeing how he talks about/with his parents for example.

i might ask some other questions as well.. such as

what do u think of lying?
1.bad.
2.its ok to do it once in while.
3.a way to escape problems.

This may appear to be a shameless plug… but I posted a list of 100 premarital questions on my blog a while back, most of which seemed to be helpful (many of which I couldn’t resist mocking!). I didn’t write it myself, but I think it would be fine to borrow from it, insha’Allah:

Premarital Counseling

1) what is your view of marriage in Islam?
2) Do you believe to be a partnership on marriage?
3) Are you confurtable with sharing?

Salamo Alaikom All,

Thanks for bringing this Drive to live, i hope we all can find and share all the questions that will help all of us to find what we are looking for in a spouse inshaa Allah, i will have my share too and post some questions.

All the best , and thanks again for all the efforts.

Farag, Mohamed

These suggested questions are derived from two sources: an article entitled “Spousal Abuse and its Prevention” by Br. Abdul Rehman in Islamic Sisters International, and the feedback I received during a workshop I led on “Choosing a Marriage Partner” at the ISSRA Conference on Health and Social Issues, Toronto, May 25, 1996.

The questions below may not be relevant for everyone, but they are listed here as a guide and catalyst to help in identifying issues that may be important.

In the section below most of the questions are for women who may want to ask their prospective husband.

The Big Issues:

(1) What makes him angry and how does he deal with his anger?

Does he blame everybody but himself?

Does he stop talking to the person involved?

Does he bear grudges (”I’ll get him back one day!”)

Has he ever physically or mentally abused anyone with whom he was angry?

Does he get angry when those who may be wiser disagree or suggest an alternative point of view?

Does he ever forgive those with whom he was angry?

(2) How does he behave during a crisis?

Does he become hostile towards an uninvolved member of an ethnic group which is known to abuse followers of Islam?

What steps does he take to face and deal with pressure?

Does he remain optimistic that things will get better, and that after every difficulty comes ease?

(3) How does he feel about women’s rights in a Muslim home?

Did he ever observe abuse from his father towards his mother?

Did he ever act to prevent abuse at home? How?

Did he believe that his father was always right?

How does he make decisions? Does he rely on his own wisdom? Does he consult with close friends?

Will he be willing to consult with his spouse on any decision?

Does he stick firmly to his decisions?

(4) How does he deal with money matters?

Does he save his money for the future?

Does he give money to charities?

When he decides to buy something, will he consult his spouse in making the decision?

How does he describe his own spending and attitude towards money?

(5) What does he expect from his wife and children?

How would he react if his expectations are not met?

What is his vision of family life?

Would he pitch in and co-operate in family chores and the upbringing of children?

Would he be willing to change to accommodate your views?

(6) What is his family like?

What level of religiousosity is in his family?

Does their approach to Islam differ from yours?

If this is a mixed match, are his folks open to outsiders, or will you face exclusion?

(7) What is his medical background?

(Many Imams in the US are now refusing to conduct Nikah until they see proof that the couple have undergone blood tests and have been given a clean bill of health)

Is there any history of major illness in his family?

Does he suffer from any illnesses?

(8) What are his views on education of women and children?

Will he allow you to continue and/or return to education?

What are his views on education and schooling of children? If you have strong views on Islamic schools, home schooling, etc., find out if his views coincide with yours.

Will he take part in the children’s upbringing and education? Will he teach them Qur’an?

(9) Where does he want to live?

Does he want to settle in the country where you now live?

Does he want to return to his homeland? Does he want to move to a new country altogether?

Will the family have to move frequently because of his profession?

Will he take your feelings into account when deciding where to live?

Does he aspire to a large and luxurious home, or will he settle for less? Does he want to live in the heart of the city, in the suburbs, or in an isolated rural setting?

Day-to-day matters

Some of these are individual preferences- what may deeply concern some may not even be an issue to others, but if you have some strong feelings on a matter, it is better to get it out into the open before you make a commitment:

(1) Food:

Do you agree on the “Zabiha or non-Zabiha meat” issue?

Does he insist on only eating the food of his own ethnic group, or are his tastes more eclectic?

Will he insist on having every meal cooked from scratch, or will you be able to have convenience food or take-away on busy days?

Does he have some strong preferences for meat, or will you “go vegetarian” some days?

(2) Smoking:

Does he smoke? Do any of his family or friends smoke? Will he let people smoke in your non-smoking home?

(3) Going Out:

How does he feel about women going outside the home? studying outside? working outside?

Will he want to “check out” your friends and only let you visit those of whom he approves?

How does he feel about women driving?

(4) Pets:

Are either of you very keen to keep pets at home?

Do either of you have any allergies, dislikes, or phobias when it comes to animals?

1. What is your concept of marriage?
2. Have you been married before?
3. Are you married now?
4. What are you expectations of marriage?
5. What are your goals in life? (long and short term)
6. Identify three things that you want to accomplish in the near future.
7. Identify three things that you want to accomplish, long term.
8. Why have you chosen me/other person as a potential spouse?
9. What is the role of religion in your life now?
10. Are you a spiritual person?
11. What is your understanding of an Islamic marriage?
12. What are you expecting of your spouse, religiously?
13. What is your relationship between yourself and the Muslims community in your area?
14. Are you volunteering in any Islamic activities?
15. What can you offer your zawj (spouse), spiritually?
16. What is the role of the husband?
17. What is the role of the wife?
18. Do you want to practice polygamy?
19. What is your relationship with your family?
20. What do you expect your relationship with the family of your spouse to be?
21. What do you expect your spouses relationship with your family to be?
22. Is there anyone in your family living with you now?
23. Are you planning to have anyone in your family live with you in the future?
24. If, for any reason, my relationship with your family turns sour, what should be done?
25. Who are your friends? (Identify at least three.)
26. How did you get to know them?
27. Why are they your friends?
28. What do you like most about them?
29. What will your relationship with them after marriage be?
30. Do you have friends of the opposite sex?
31. What is the level of your relationship with them now?
32. What will be the level of your relationship with them after marriage?
33. What type of relationship do you want your spouse to have with your friends?
34. What are the things that you do in your free time?
35. Do you love to have guests in your home for entertainment?
36. What are you expecting from your spouse when your friends come to the house?
37. What is your opinion of speaking other languages in home that I do not understand? (with friends or family)
38. Do you travel?
39. How do you spend your vacations?
40. How do you think your spouse should spend vacations?
41. Do you read?
42. What do you read?
43. After marriage, do you think that you are one to express romantic feelings verbally?
44. After marriage, do you think that you want to express affection in public?
45. How do you express your admiration for someone that you know now?
46. How do you express your feelings to someone who has done a favor for you?
47. Do you like to write your feelings?
48. If you wrong someone, how do you apologize?
49. If someone has wronged you, how do you want (s)he to apologize to you?
50. How much time passes before you can forgive someone?
51. How do you make important and less important decisions in your life?
52. Do you use foul language at home? In public? With family?
53. Do your friends use foul language?
54. Does your family use foul language?
55. How do you express anger?
56. How do you expect your spouse to express anger?
57. What do you do when you are angry?
58. When do you think it is appropriate to initiate mediation in marriage?
59. When there is a dispute in your marriage, religious or otherwise, how should the conflict get resolved?
60. Define mental, verbal, emotional and physical abuse.
61. What would you do if you felt that you had been abused?
62. Who would you call for assistance if you were being abused?
63. Do you suffer from any chronic disease or condition?
64. Are you willing to take a physical exam by a physician before marriage?
65. What is your understanding of proper health and nutrition?
66. How do you support your own health and nutrition?
67. What is you definition of wealth?
68. How do you spend money?
69. How do you save money?
70. How do you think that your use of money will change after marriage?
71. Do you have any debts now? If so, how are you making progress to eliminate them?
72. Do you use credit cards?
73. Do you support the idea of taking loans to buy a new home?
74. What are you expecting from your spouse financially?
75. What is your financial responsibility in the marriage?
76. Do you support the idea of a working wife?
77. If so, how do you think a dual-income family should manage funds?
78. Do you currently use a budget to manage your finances?
79. Who are the people to whom you are financially responsible?
80. Do you support the idea of utilizing baby sitters and/or maids?
81. Do you want to have children? If not, how come?
82. To the best of your understanding, are you able to have children?
83. Do you want to have children in the first two years of marriage? If not, when?
84. Do you believe in abortion?
85. Do you have children now?
86. What is your relationship with your children now?
87. What is your relationship with their other parent?
88. What relationship do you expect your spouse to have with your children and their parent?
89. What is the best method(s) of raising children?
90. What is the best method(s) of disciplining children?
91. How were you raised?
92. How were you disciplined?
93. Do you believe in spanking children? Under what circumstances?
94. Do you believe in public school for your children?
95. Do you believe in Islamic school for your children?
96. Do you believe in home schooling for your children?
97. What type of relationship should your children have with non-Muslim classmates/friends?
98. Would you send your children to visit their extended family if they lived in another state or country?
99. What type of relationship do you want your children to have with all their grandparents?
100. If there are members of my family that are not Muslim, that are of different race or culture, what type of relationship do you want to have with them?

1) Are you following the Qur’an and sunnah as much as possible?
a)Yes i read the Quran totally in 7-10 days and follow the sunah by reading all hadiths insha allah
b)Yes ofcourse,i do read quran and i know the hadiths(compound hypocrisy)
c)I recite Quran ,ive studied it inside out,i study also the hadiths to know what is haram and what is halal(the beeeest)
d)i dont know how to recite or read quran
e) yes,sometimes

2) did you ever have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
a)yes but we never slept together
b)yes ,but i regret
c)yes,but we never kissed
d) i never had or intended to have relations with the opposite sex,even if its talk it must be something neccessary as in work
e)yes,i had

3)do you listen to music ?
a)yes it;s my life,i often find it suitable for every moments of my life
b)yes i listen but ocasionally only
c)only nasheeds but they have instruments
d)no,only halal songs which are only vocal,or i listen to the qur’an( best offer)

4)do you fast?
a)yes cause im not married and the prophet saws teached us to be chest and fast
b)in ramadan
c)not really
d)every monday and thursday
e)yes,on Fridays (:-s)

5)

I tried to post and the spam blocker killed by comments!!!

How would you teach your children about Islam?
a) Put them in an Islamic school
b) Homeschool them
c) Hire a private tutor

What’s your priority in life?
a) Career
b) Family
c) It depends on my life stages

When you are offered something you don’t like to eat, you:
a) Try to eat it
b) Be frank but polite
c) Try to find an excuse

How do you feel about interest loans?
a) It’s a must living in the west
b) It’s not an option
c) I know it’s haram, but I need the loan

After marriage, if you have a conflict with your spouse, you
a) I try to fix it without telling anyone else
b) I call my family
c) I call my in-laws

Under what situation you compromise your DEEN
a) Never
b) I love Islam, but it’s hard
c) It depends, I’m weak

How do you feel about practicing Islam in public?
a) It’s hard, but it’s rewarding
b) I’m loving it, even others say it’s hard
c) Faith is a private matter, no need to express it in public

What do you do, when your in-laws family want to do haram at your wedding reception?
a) I won’t agree, and I can walk out of marriage
b) Let me get married first, they can have what they want
c) I’d negotiate and may compromise my concept of ideal reception

Assalaam aleykum warahmatulah wabarakatuh

I would suggest someone asking the following question to someone they are maybe interested to get married to.

What kind of temper do you have when dealing with others concerning a stressful thing?

a/ I mostly stay calm
b/ I get frustrated when they do not understand me nor take my suggestions
c/ I sometimes stay calm

Asalaamu Alaykum,
I didn’t read all the questions above but here are some that I guess I would ask someday.
1. How important is your religion to you personally right now? How important was it in the household while growing up?
2. How important is your culture to you? Which had more influences over you as a child? Are you able to separate one from the other without trouble?
3. Does it make any difference to you that I am not from a Muslim family and have chosen to become Muslim?
4. Does it matter to your family if I am from a different culture (if I am.)
5. Do you think it’s ok for a woman to go to the masjid, or should she not go?
6. (I personally plan to get a Ph.D for my career goal.) Where does education fall on your list of priorities?
7. Would you care if I by choice chose to have a job and contribute to the family? Would that affect your self esteem negatively or make you feel like I was taking away from your right as a husband to provide for his family?
8. (I don’t wear hijab yet, but i dress modestly, I cover my hair when going to the masjid, and I hope to wear it fully one day) How do you feel about women in Hijab? Does it make you think less of a woman without her hair covered but still modest?
9. Do you want kids? (if yes, how many?)
10. How well do you speak Arabic? Would you pass on that knowledge to your children if you have any so that they could learn the Qur’an and understand it too? Would you be willing to help teach me?
11. How much do you consider yourself a “practicing” muslim?
12. What is your relationship to your parents?
13. Would you consider a second wife? If yes why?
14. Would you marry for love or would you prefer an arranged marriage?
15. If I gave you advice without scolding or talking down, would you at least be willing to listen to me?
16. Do you prefer to think of your wife as passive or strong willed?
17. Would I be allowed to go out with my friends without you being jealous of the time I spend with them?
18. Would i be able to invite friends over to the house?
19. Am I expected to be a housewife or will you contribute to maintaining the home?
20. I was raised to view marriage as a partnership, something important, and with a mutual love and compassion for each other. How were you raised to view marriage?
21. Do you consider yourself openminded?
22. Do you consider yourself sympathetic?
23. Do you have a passion? (for learning, for trying new things, for traveling, etc)
24. Do you consider yourself a hard worker? In what way?
25. Do you consider yourself judgmental?
26. Would you be embarrassed of me in public?
27. How do you handle stress?
28. How do you handle anger?
29. The Prophet (saw) said “The believers who show the most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives ” (Tirmidhi)…will you be willing to remember that hadith when you are frustrated?
30. Do you want the wedding to be separated by gender?
31. Do you consider being “american muslim” a bad thing?
32. Do you plan to go to the middle east to live there?
33. Why would you want to marry me?
.
sorry if the list is long or if the questions are repeated
I hope they are helpful

maybe…

Would you consider marrying someone who’s not from the same country of origin as you?

a) Yes, I’m interested in different cultures
b) Yes, I don’t mind their country of origin
b) Yes, but only if they’re from a similar background
c) No, I’m interested in people from my heritage

edit it if you like

1. If later down the line I wanted to wear niqab, would you support me?
2. Do you think it is proper for me to be in around other men with you there?

Is one of your goals Islamic education for your wife and if you cannot put in the time, are you willing to support that education financially and emotionally through an Islamic atmosphere? ie. women separate than men.

How often do you go to the masjid for Salaat? Everyday, each prayer, most of the prayers.

*added more choices to question already mentioned*

How often do you pray at the masjid?
a. I try to make it to every prayer when possible
b. At least once a day
c. Once a week
d. Once a month
3. On major events and holidays

As salaamu alaykum wa rahmatullah wa barakatu.
Insha’Allah the following is of benefit. From what i have read of some of the questions masha’Allah very benefical. Insha’Allah the bellow from me are not repeats, as haven’t read everything as yet. Also more questions may be headed this way…

. What are your views on the islamic practices?

. Is there any such requirements for you as to what level of iman are you satistified with to marry someone? what requirements must they meet, if any that is for youself.

.What are you looking for in your protential spouses character and iman?

. How religious inclined are you?

. Have you always been in the deen practicing?

. forfilling the five obligatiory pillars of islam, what are your thoughts on this?

.How can a person better themselves?

. Most important things in your life?

. Who do you love the most?

. Any known health issues?

. What are you looking for in a spouse?

. How best to maintain relationships of the halal nature, wether it be family or friends?

. What is your view on pologmy?

. Do you enjoy learning?

. Are you a sensitive person?

. Name a few good characterists?

. Would you want to be corrected for any faults?

. What does constructive criticism mean to you?

.Would you adopt an orphan? (according to Quran and sunnah)

. Would you takecare of someone ill?

. If so are you able to takecare of someone ill?

.

. Can you cook?

. Why decide to marry me? (if a decision from one of the two protentials has been made) awaiting the others decision.

. For those living in a non muslim country. Would you like to do Hijrah? where to and at any particular time?

. Would you pefer to marry someone whom family are religious and practicing? If they are non muslims and non practicing muslims would this effect your decision in marrying?

How do you feel about women traveling with out a mahram (with a group of women)?
a. Not acceptable in any cases
b. Traveling to seek knowledge is acceptable
c. I do not prefer it, but I will allow it under certain cirumstances
d. Completely acceptable

How much Quran have you memorized?
a. Less than 1 Juz
b. About 1-2 Juz
c. About 3-5 Juz
d. More than 5 Juz
e. I am a Hafiz

Do you attend mixed weddings or gatherings?
a. Yes
b. No
c. I do not prefer to but I will attend if absolutely neccesary i.e. close family member

Are you willing to more away from your home/family?
a. Yes
b. No
c. I am willing to but I would rather not

Will you allow your wife to work?
a. Yes
b. No
c. If she can manage the home/children and work, then yes
d. Before children; yes, afterward; no
e. Only if we are financially in need

How often do you attend Islamic lectures/classes?
a. Daily
b. Once a week
c. Once a month
d. A few times a year
d. Never

Do you listen to music?
a. Yes
b. No
c. No, it is haram
d. Yes, but i’m trying to stop
e. Only nasheed

Do you think marriage compatibility can be done through a survey-based algorithm?

(a) For sure! My life is one big algorithm! I only think in ‘if-then’ statements and I see all my actions in flow-charts, loops, recursive functions and precisely defined variables
(b) Yes! It’s good to have a structured approach to major decisions in life
(c) Maybe! It really depends on the assumptions underlying the algorithm
(d) Maybe! But not if the algorithm only matches my choices with that of the potential spouse: I would love to have someone who complements me and not only mirrors me: I want us to learn from & grow with each other.
(e) No! What if the algorithm behind the survey is not what I want?
(f) Of course not! I don’t believe in algorithms…this must be the idea of a software engineer!
(g) Algor-who? What on Allah’s good green earth is an algorithm?

Before I start I must say this is a great idea. I am a single Muslim sister and i have never took the time to write out or even think about questions to ask a brother who could potentially be my spouse, so thank you for developing this.
1. What are your expectations of your spouse

2. How do you feel about your wife working instead of staying home with the kids:
a. Very comfortable- if thats what she wants i’m ok
b. Somewhat comfortable- i would like her to stay home for a little while then go to work.
c. Not comfortable- she should work, she should stay at home and raise the children.

3. What are your financial expectations for yourself and your wife.

4. How strong is your desire to consider a polygamous marriage in the future

5. Would you be willing to relocate for your spouse.

6. Do you have any desire to live in another country for an extended period of time.

7. How much (if any) community service do you participate in.

8. What are some of you pet peeves about other people

9. How well do you interact with people of different cultures and faiths

10. how would you rate the strength of your dean from 1-10, 1 being weakest, 10 being strongest

11. What are some of your personal Islamic goals

12. Is it important to you to have your children attend an Islamic school.

13. How strong is your social life (Halal… Muslim events or events with friends, or cultural events not going to the club etc)
a. I am a social Butterfly, I am involved in numerous groups, and projects
b. I am not as social as I would like, but I do enjoy when I am able to get out
c. I am not very social, I occasionally go out
d. I do not like to go out at all. I prefer to stay at home if I am not doing any mandatory activities ( school, work, jummah etc)

14. How diverse was your upbringing i.e. did you have friends of different cultures or religions growing up

15. Would you marry someone who is of a different culture or race than you

16. How does your family feel about you being involved in inter cultural or interracial relationships.
a. it does not matter at all to them
b. they prefer me to marry someone of a similar race or culture, but it is not a major issue for them
c. They will not approve if i marry someone who is not the same culture or race as me.

17. What is your highest level of education
a. High School
B. Some College
c. Undergrad degree
d. Grad Degree

18. is it an issue for you if your spouse has a higher degree level or income level than you.
a. not an issue, i am proud of it
b. a slight issue, but i don’t lose sleep over it
c. I will not marry anyone who is not at an higher income or education level than me

19. What are your political views
a. Liberal
b. moderate
c. conservative
d. I do not identify myself with any political label

20. What is your previous relationship experience
a. Single, never married, never engaged, never have (or considered dating)
b. I am unmarried, but i have dated before, but that was a unfocused time in my life, and i would not considered that ever again
c. i date regularly, and don’t think that there is anything wrong with it.

Since I am Hispanic and was turned down by a family before because I was Spanish and also being a new Muslim. I made sure to ask potential spouses besides the usual the following questions:

1) is your family comfortable with you marrying outside of your race?

2) if you find out that it is or it has become a problem how will you handle it?

3) Is your family comfortable with you marrying a convert?

————————–
DON’T DO THE FOLLOWING:
1) Lie about your age. I was told by a friend of the brother that he was 27 years old (I had just turned 21 at the time), while we were arriving at the restaurant where I was supposed to meet him, I was informed that he might be 30. When I sat down at the table and finally got to ask him his age, he wouldn’t answer. After giving him the stare down he said he “might” be 34.

2) Don’t mistake her NOs for YES. (Same brother) after clearly stating that I was not interested and would like to go home my “friend” was nowhere to be found. In the mean time the brother kept trying to convince me that he was the one for me and that he would give me a ride home.

3) DON’T start naming offspring that you and her might have on the first interview. (Same brother) He said, “I think our first born should be called Yusuf.” Me: How about no.

4) Don’t try to bribe her in to marrying you. (I actually been told this)
Brother: “If you marry me you will NEVER have to work again”
ME: No thank you (I am a housewife/entrepreneur now but it creeped me out to be asked in such a way).

Brother: “if you marry me I will pay off ALL your student loans”
Me: Please stop.

————————
this is just a pet peeve of mine.
when showing up to meet a potential spouse (with your guardian) ALWAYS dress neat and clean. If you wouldn’t show up to a job interview looking the way you do its probably not a good idea to show up to a marriage ‘interview’ looking like that either. Think about it, this is one of the most important interview in your life so dress accordingly (no club gear either).

What is your relationship with the Quran?

1-I have memorized and revise daily
2-I have a good relationship with it and hope to memorize it one day - insh’Allah
3-I read it sometimes, mostly during Ramadan
4-I don’t read the Arabic, but try to read the translation once in a while
5-I don’t have a relationship wit the Quran

Are you muslim ?

Name a person that you would want your children to respect:
a) Quaid-e-Azam
b) Muhammad ibn Abdillah
c) Albert Einstein
d) Ayatullah Khomenei

If you are told to do something in the authentic Sunnah but no mention of it is found in the Qur’an what does that mean?
a) You don’t have to do it
b) It is Sunnah to do it
c) You must do it
d) I’ll do it if my local Imam recommends it

Would you consider someone of another culture?
A) yes
B) no
C) depends on how different

Would you consider someone from another country?
A) yes
B) no
C) depends on how different

Some cultures do this so … Would you live with your in-laws?
A) Yes, is there any other way?
B) Yes, until we get enough together for our own place
C) depends on if we get along
D) No, we need our space
E) Not sure but we can discuss it.

Do you snore?

Have you got any phobias?

Will you accompany your wife to travel to 3rd world countries and do some voluntary work?

salam alakykum

why do u think its easyer to deal with non mulims men and women then muslims?
1- bczy you dont live in the same culther
2- bcz they just want to be friend of urs
3- bcz ur parents wont say anything

why is it harder for mulims to get really married?
1- bcz of parents
2- money
3- cant find sone one who is reall serious about it
4- all the above

What is the MOST important elements below, in building a great relationship between husband and wife?
a) Communication
b) Patience
c) Understanding
d) Be aware of each other feelings.

What if one day, your wife decided to look for a job after years staying at home as a full time house wife, would you…
a) tell her working is not such a great idea, she should just stay at home as a housewife.
b) ask her what is the job she looking for and give her supports
c) tell her that u are providing enough for the family and if she is bored try to pick up a hobby

Would you mind marrying someone who is from a different race and migrate to his/her country to live with her?
a)No
b)Yes
c) yes, depend on which country he/she is living in

What would you do if your spouse is infertiled?
a) find a second spouse
b) adopt a baby
c) go see a specialist

How would you make ur spouse happy if he/she is upset about something?
a) cook a great meal where we can sit and talk
b) my spouse will never be upset cos i know how to make he/she happy
c) i would want him/her to tell me whats bothering him/her cos i hate the silent treatment

Would you go for looks, brain or personality?
a) i would look into the heart cos the heart will show the true personality
b) definately brain, need someone with brain not going to marry a bimbo
c)looks,brain and personality… no harm in choosing all three rite?

would you marry someone with a congenitil illness?
a) No
b) Yes, why not no one is perfect whats important is good iman
c) well depend on what type of illness is it.

how often do you watch sports?
a. 2 hours a day
b. 2 hours a week
c. never
d. more than 2 hours a day

A’asalam Aleykum wa Rahmatullah wa Barakatuh
Ramadan Mubarak!
You asked for volunteers for revising these into multiple choice. In all humility, may it be pleasing to Allah, I have made a humble attempt. I hope these keep the intent Meeeeg7 desired. Some were solely yes/no questions others were more creative. Please forgive my occasional stab at humor.

May Allah reward all with a happy marriage. ameen
sis Dee

Meeeeg7 Said,
August 27th, 2008 @8:28 am

1. How often do you wake up for fajr, one time?
I wake for fajr:
a. every morning
b. most mornings and trying to change
c. once in a while
d. never

2. Do you pray during the last third of the night?
Revised
I pray during the last third of the night:
a. every night
b. most nights
c. once in a while
d. never

3. Who do you model your life after?
a. our Prophet (pbuh)
b. sport hero
c. famous person
d. family member
e. Qur’an and Sunnah

4.Would marry someone who has reverted back to islam?
a. yes
b. no
c. maybe, it depends on many factors

5. Do you want your wife to work or stay at home with children?
Would your wife:
a. stay home with children
b. work
c. stay home and work
d. I would not interfere with her choice

6. Would you mind having a stepchild?
a. yes
b. no
c. willing to discuss it
d. depends on how many

7. Would you treat that child as your own?
a. yes
b. no

8. What role do our past relationships play on your decision, if any?
a. none
b. small role
c. large role
d. better not be any past relationships!

9. Is salafi and sunni the same thing?
a. yes
b. no
c. what’s salafi?
d. what’s sunni?

10. Do you want kids of your own?
a. yes
b. no
c. maybe, it’s a serious discussion

11. How would you treat me if I was having a bad week and I was doing everything that gets on your nerves?
a. give back what you gave me
b. with compassion and gentle words
c. go to a friends’ or my parents till you cool down
d. anger and argument
e. reminders of our Prophet (pbuh) and prayer

12. Do you hold grudges?
a. yes
b. no

13. How important is your involvement with my kafr family?
revised:
I am a revert to Islam. My family are not. How will you interact with them?
a. never, they are kafr and might taint our beliefs
b. they’re still your family. I will love and honor them.
c. a little but not as much as if they were Muslim
d. we’ll convert them

14. How would you treat them?
a. good
b. they don’t exist
c. as good as they treat us

15. Is weight an issue?
a. yes
b. how much/little weight?
c. no

16. Are you willing to teach me Arabic even if I am the worst student?
a. yes
b. no
c. if I can’t I’ll get you the best teachers or classes.

17. Is there a difference between sex and making love?
a. yes
b. no

18. Do you like kissing?
a. yes
b. no
c. foreplay is sunnah

19. Do you have to be intimate to be passionate?
a. yes
b. no

20. What role does Allah s.w.t. play in sex?
a. none
b. some
c. a lot

21. Do you say any dua’s before being intimate?
a. always
b. sometimes
c. never but would learn

22. Would you ever put your hands on me in a negative way?
a. of course, you’re mine to do with as I please.
b. never, it’s forbidden to harm your wife.

23. Have you ever gotten in a physical fight?
a. yes I stand my ground
b. a few, but they started it
c. a few, but they were pissing me off
d. never. I treat all with gentleness and compassion.

24. Is there such a thing as extremism in Islam?
a. yes
b. no

25. What do you expect my role has a wife should be?
a. keep house and children
b. a partner

26. What are your roles as a husband?
a. to control all things in the household
b. to support and care for you and our children
c. to lead and guide our lives properly according to the Qur’an and Sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh)

27. If I make halal money what would you expect me to do with it?
a. put it into the family.
b. keep it
c. whatever you decided to do with it would be fine since it’s yours to do with as you please.

28. How important is Jummah to you?
a. not at all
b. somewhat
c. extremely

29. Would you ever miss Jummah? If so, why?
a. yes
b. no
c. it would have to be something very important for me to miss Jummah

30. What kind of friends do you have?
a. kufr
b. Muslim
c. mixture

31. Do you entertain friends at your home?
a. yes
b. no
c. occasionally

32. Do you sit and talk strictly about Allah s.w.t. and Islam or do you have idle talks about trivial talks?
a. we’ll only discussion Islam
b. We’ll discuss whatever the moment brings up
c. Talk? We have to talk?

33. DO you watch sports? If so, how often?
a. never
b. occasionally
c. never miss a game

34. Do you play sports? How often?
a. some
b. occasionally
c. love it and play it all the time

35. Have you missed Salaat for either? If so, how often?
a. never
b. I have but it was for good reason
c. I have because I was involved in the game

Meeeeg7 Said,
August 27th, 2008 @8:33 am

1. If later down the line I wanted to wear niqab, would you support me?
a. yes
b. no

2. Do you think it is proper for me to be around other men with you there?
a. yes
b. no

2) Do you think people can be trusted these days?

~a) No, most people are liars these days.
~b) Yes, but just to be on the safe side it’s better not to trust people too often.
~c) Of course, most people have good intentions. You can trust them.
~d) It all depends on your situation.
~e) I trust everybody.

4) Can you speak Arabic?

~a) Yes, I was raised in an Arabic speaking country.
~b) Yes, because I went to an islamic school.
~c) I learnt some from my Arab friends.
~d) No, but I am in the process of learning.
~e) I will learn one day, insha’Allah. Right now I’m kinda busy.
~f) No, I don’t need to. I can just read the translation of the Qur’an in my own language.

6) Where are you from?

~a) Middle east
~b) The indian subcontinent
~c) I’m asian.
~d) Africa.
~e) I’m European.
~f) I’m from the Pacific Ocean/Oceania(Australia/NZ)
~g) North America
~h) Central/South America.
~i) I come from a mixed background.
~j) Other….(please specify)

{Sorry for exceeding your option limit of 5 but for this Question I feel it’s necessary to have all of these different backgrounds because people will want to know exactly where you’re from}

ooooh I like this n I can’t wait to get started doing my own so I can post it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n just for a heads up I’m from America so the questions I post will be relative to things here…. heheh I wouldnt ask about camels n stuff like that hehehee!!!!!!!! yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay may ALLAH make some really good successful marriages come from this project!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!